Apologies

I’m sorry.

I’m sorry that your cat is dead.

I’m sorry that your cat ran in front of my car while I was pulling into the driveway.

I’m sorry that I didn’t see your cat.

I’m sorry that your cat is now under my car’s front left tire.

I’m sorry that you forgot to keep your cat inside today.

I’m sorry that your cat was stupid enough to run underneath my approaching tire.

I’m sorry that your cat was fat, and ugly.

I’m sorry that it would always leave dead mice on my porch.

I’m sorry that I would always step on them when I picked up my newspaper.

I’m sorry that your cat bit my daughter.

I’m sorry that I kicked your cat after it bit my daughter.

I’m sorry that your cat was the epitome of evil

I’m sorry that I’m not really that sorry your cat is dead.

I’m sorry that it didn’t die ages ago.

I’m sorry.